BAMA!

Here I am!

Howdy ya’ll. I’m getting to spend my first winter in the deep south and I’m thinking this needs to become a yearly tradition. Who knew there were places in the world where you could get a tan in January?! The weather down here has been pretty amazing. Highs in the 70’s and I’ve got quite the farmers tan going on. I’m really starting to wish AmeriCorps would issue me some a work appropriate tank tops cuz these puppies need to breathe. The only draw back to being here in Mobile, Alabama is that rumor has it that this is the wettest city in the 48 contiguous states. I would tend to agree because we had two days of torrential downpours like I’ve never seen in my life as opposed to Seattle who likes to slowly drizzle for the whole month of January. Let me tell ya I don’t miss that.

So for my project down here my team has been working with Habitat for Humanity on new construction projects and so far it has been so much fun…well…except for yesterday when I literally shoveled a pile of dirt, moved it several feet, spread it out with a rake, and then repeated the process for approximately 6 hours. Talk about stimulating. My site supervisors are hilarious and luckily have enough patience to deal with someone like me who hadn’t a clue on how to build a house. Of course all my questions usually result with an eye roll or a “are you serious?” remark, but I know they do it out of love. So far the main things I’ve worked on was putting up siding, soffit, and shingles and of course nailing everything in sight. And not to brag or anything but I push a mean skill saw these days.

The whole culture of the south is very fascinating to me and very different from Washington. For one thing I think it’s mandatory for ever food chain to carry fried chicken and the biggest fashion statement here are guys who buy enormous fishing hooks and hook them around the brim of their hat. I mean I guess it looks cool and you never know when you might feel the spontaneous urge to fish but it seems a little dangerous and I’m curious as to how many of these cool kids have lost an eye all for the sake of fashion. Another big thing is chewing tobacco, especially among the Habitat site supervisors. They are constantly spitting everywhere and thank God for hard hats because you never know when a stray spit may strike from someone laying shingles. Another big thing down here are churches. Last week I went to the largest church I’ve ever been too and their parking lot equally rivaled that of a Wal-Mart. It’s insane. Churches down here are like Starbucks in Seattle. The amount and close proximity of them seems a little ridiculous at times and I had no idea how many denominations there were which has made picking a church on Sundays quite the ordeal. Last week we found a church online that sounded good and once we arrived there on Sunday morning we saw that it was held in part of an old strip mall. This might be my favorite things about the south and possibly their most ingenious idea which is put every human essential into a strip mall and call it good. I’ve literally driven down the road and seen a strip mall with a church, a bar, tanning salon, and dollar general all in a row. Talk about convenience!

The living situation on this trip has been interesting to say the least. There’s 21 of us living in a trailer who’s previous owner must have found a blind carpenter to work for cheap because it has the worst add-on I’ve ever seen. Every room has as many beds crammed into it as possible and the only place I’ve ever been able to get Wi-Fi is on top of washing machine. We have only one couch so we eat all our meals on the floor. I’ve never felt so claustrophobic in my life. My bedroom is literally the size of my room in Ashton Hall and there are 6 of us guys living in it. One of the guys snores but thankfully I have my Yosemite Falls noise machine to put me to sleep. The neighborhood we live in is definitely lower income but pretty decent although I like to be dramatic and tell people we live in the ghetto. Last weekend I volunteered at the Convoy of Hope which was an community event where people could come get food, groceries, shoes, etc…Anyways, I was working in food services and had just bagged my 600th hot dog when a girl I’d been chatting with called me a Yankee after I told her I was from Washington State. I’m pretty sure Washington wasn’t even in existence let alone part of the union during the war and I could have sworn that the war ended in Gone with the Wind but she told me she gets along well with us Northern folk so I guess there were no hurt feeling. Then I was asking her where she lived and she was saying how it was pretty nice area and I was like “oh yeah well I live on Westchester Road in the ghetto.” Then she turned to me and was like “I live a block away from there. Are you saying I live in the GHETTO??!!!” It got awkward real fast and she was obviously offended but it was too late for damage control because out of nowhere an old man next to her chimed in and said that his church was on that street. Long story short I didn’t make any new Facebook friends that day.

One of the things that I think has surprised me the most about the south is how everyone apparently lives in a trailer. I mean I knew that the south had it’s money issues but when every right turn is a trailer park called Craig’s Place it can be pretty aggravating trying to find the nearest Wal-Mart. Also I constantly find myself thinking that I’m in the 3rd season of the OC where Julie Cooper Nichols loses all her money and has to move to a trailer park and soon comes to the hilarious realization that she can put her house in reverse. Haha. Man I miss that show. But even more aggravating than the maze of trailers has been the dog situation. I realize now that when Bob Barker would end The Price is Right by saying “remember to spay and neuter your animals” that he was speaking directly to the state of Alabama. The amount of dogs per square inch is out of control and they all just wander around mating with each other and making some of the ugliest dogs I’ve ever seen. I’d honestly be surprised if there was a single purebred in this city. Three people on team have already been chased down by dogs and one even tore my friend Kyla’s shorts. I’ve always felt that a dog could sense I was a dog lover but that doesn’t seem to be the case down here and going for my weekly run has become the most stressful part of my week. I feel like I owe mama Sesser an apology for all the times I made fun of her when she’d claim a dog tried to attack her during her power prayer walks around the track.

It's a new year and I'm back to the land of below 0

Well here I am. Back in Iowa. Three flights and 15 hours of travel later.

My first flight went pretty smooth. Pasco to San Fran. Once in San Fran we were stuck on the runway for a while and the man next to me started talking to me and asked me where I was going and what I did. So I explained the whole AmeriCorps thing where I’m giving my country a year of service by helping with disaster relief, building houses for people in the south, etc... You know, the usual. I was feeling pretty good about myself. Then I asked him what he did. He told me he worked for the government and was flying to DC for work. I was intrigued so I asked him to be more specific. Turns out he’s a nuclear engineer who’d been hired by homeland security to develop technology that would keep America safe from nuclear attacks from places like North Korea, or maybe it’s South Korea…I always get them confused. Anyways how do you even top that!!! Needless to say I felt kind of lame and wished I had a more exciting job.

My longest flight was between San Fran and Chicago and it was roughly a four hour flight and I had planned ahead and asked for an isle seat because I knew with all of the cran-apple cocktails I tend to consume on flights that I’d be visiting the little boys room probably twice every hour and I hate having to climb over people and ask them to move. Then from the end of the isle I see this red headed kid with freckles hobbling down the isle on crutches with those sad puppy eyes and wouldn’t you know it he is supposed to sit in the middle seat of my row. So the cripple(I think he had a broken foot) comes up to me and just stares at me with those crocodile tears welling up and I’m trying to stay firm but I totally cave and offer him my seat so that he can get out easier. I figure why not, be the bigger man, what’s another crown in heaven to lay at the feet of Jesus? So I got stuck in the middle seat, which also sucked because I’m extremely claustrophobic on planes. 4 hour flight. Had to ask the poor little guy to move out of his seat three before I nearly wet myself from all the juice. And the only movie they showed on the plane was Four Christmases. Apparently Delta didn’t get the news flash that Christmas is long over and its actually 2010 now. Happy New Year.

Another awkward thing that happened during my travel was while I was waiting for my Chicago flight to board I figured what better time to whiten my teeth with my new crest white strips then while I’m waiting for my plane. So I go to the men’s bathroom and slide on the strips with the thought process that I’m not a very sociable person when I’m flying and tend to keep to myself so I won’t have to try to talk to people while wearing these things. Go figure, there I am clutching onto my Eclipse book of the Twilight Series and up comes some lady who’s holding the first book and she wants to know how I like it, if I saw the movies, am I team Edward, blah blah blah. Meanwhile I’m doing my best to not drool all over myself when I speak as I make sure my lips are constantly covering my teeth and of course whenever I give a courtesy laugh to something she says I turn the other way so she’s not wondering what the hell is one my teeth. Moral of the story: whiten teeth only in the privacy of your own home because those commercials are misleading where they pay actors to make it seem like you no one notices when you’re wearing them.

It was nice being back home for the holidays. Mama hooked me up with a $50 gift card to McDonald's which means any weight loss aspirations i dreamt of just flew out the drive through window. I also got to see tons of great friends and family, learned to knit slippers, and had myself a Disney marathon which is always delightful but it was more work and less play as I tried to make up for lost time and get some more community hours. I’m trying to get the Presidential award this year which is a piece of paper that Obama will sign if I complete 100 hours of individual community service. Kind of a gold star kind of thing. It’s gonna look pretty sweet on a resume if the fact that I served at an old folks home and cleared nature trails means anything in the graphic design world. You never know. But either way that thing is going to be framed and hanging about my fireplace for all my guests to see unlike mama and papa Sesser who used to have a Christmas card from George and Laura Bush on their mantle. Tomatoe, tomatoe.

During the first week of break I went and volunteered at Odd Fellows Home, which is where my grandma lives. While serving there I did tons of exciting things like rewinding 45 VHS tapes and playing dominoes with elderly women suffering dementia who must of thought I was born yesterday with the amount of times they tried to cheat. The Wednesday before the holidays was the big Christmas party so I was pretty stoked to help out and spread some Christmas cheer. I put together little gift bags, wrote some of the residents Christmas cards and set up all the chairs for the concert. After all that it was time for the party consisting of what turned out to be a cart full of peppermint schnapps hot chocolate and a local Elvis Presley impersonator who I would have sworn was Ted Kennedy in a blue jump suit if I hadn’t been in DC during his funeral. RIP. So I can’t say I’ve ever been much of an Elvis fan and I’m even less a fan of Elvis impersonators so it quickly turned into an hour and a half of pure torture. I mean I know I was getting community service hours for simply sitting there but I would have taken laying sandbags along the Mississippi river in the pouring rain over this any day. Even grandma hated it and kept asking me when he was going to be done. I think she really just wanted a smoke. We both agreed we wished there had been a Bing Crosby impersonator instead.

Kids These Days

Well I’m locked out of my room so I guess I finally have time to blog again…My team and I just got back from Michigan yesterday and it’s nice to be back at home in Vinton except for it was definitely 0 degrees when I went out for dinner last night which wasn’t very pleasant. These next few days we’ll just be finishing up odds and ends, presenting our project debrief where we talk about the project we just finished and then I’m packing up and flying back to Washington, PRAISE JESUS. All I want to be doing right now is to be curled up by the fire in Sisters, nibbling on some wine bread with my Bing Crosby doll serenading me in the background as I read me some Twilight because ever since I saw New Moon I’ve been dying to read the third book.

So the past two weeks of life have been a whole lot of crazy because someone thought it would be a good idea for me to be a cabin leader to 5th grade boys. After spending two weeks with them I have a new found respect for teachers and a much greater appreciation for Ritalin because seriously that ish should be served to every child by 7 am thus making my life a lot easier.

Starting Nov. 30 my team was assigned the kids that we would have in our cabins and then after that we were given slips of paper detailing medical backgrounds on the kids that might be worth knowing. Most people got maybe one or two sheets and then of course I’m given the mother load of 7 sheets of paper. I was scurred. I found out that my cabin consisted of two asthmatics who couldn’t even power walk without an inhaler, one bed wetter who woke me up at 5 in the morning to tell me he had drunk a lot of water before going to bed but that he had cleaned it all up with paper towels, one sleep walker who I wouldn’t let sleep on the top bunk for obvious safety reason, a kid with ADD who gave me the stink eye for three hours straight on the day he didn’t take his meds, and finally a kid with Aspergers. To put it lightly, I had my hands full.

The week was full of hilarious things because 5th graders are ridiculous and unfortunately as the adult I was forced to try to hide my laughter during certain situations. Some of my fav moments from week are as follows:
1. When a kid named Dorian got stuck on the top bunk because he had an intense fear of heights. Why he picked the top bunk is still a complete mystery. So for ten minutes he couldn’t figure out how to get down and had a panic attack and started crying. This all took place within the first 10 minutes of us moving into the cabin. It took all my strength to keep from dying laughing.
2. When one of the horses farted and coughed at the same time and 30 kids couldn’t stop laughing for 5 minutes. I’ll admit. It was pretty hilarious.
3. When one of my really really hyper kids ran around the cabin in his whitie tighties screaming, “boys just wanna have fun!” over and over.
4. When I tried to convince a group of kids at my dinner table that I was dating Demi Levato and that I had a small part in Camp Rock and then having them tell me that I’m obviously too old for Demi and if I was dating someone famous it would probably be Taylor Swift. I totally went along with it until some smarty-pants blabbed that she’s dating Tayler Laughtner who plays Jacob in Twilight. How could I compete with that???
5.Realizing that the fifth graders that always saved a seat for me at meals were the really popular kids. I’m not gonna lie, it made me feel pretty cool.

Throughout the week that kids attended outdoor environmental classes such as Star Lab where we crawled into a blow up planetarium with a projector that showed us the constellations. It was a great place for naps. The kids also learned how to build fires, look at microscopic organisms under a microscope, how to build a shelter in the wilderness, and how to use a compass. The favorite class for most of the kids was Horse Sense where we learned about horses and then got to ride them. My horse was named Lou and he was the sweetest horse ever. He loved to be petted and he would always put his head against my chest when I’d come up to him. An interesting fact about Lou was that he was known throughout camp as the horse that spontaneously passes out. Once I finally mounted him it was the most stressful horseback ride of my life as I was constantly looking for an emergency exit because if that thing was going down there was no way I could abandon ship fast enough.

Week 1 in Michigan

We just finished our first workweek in Michigan and we’re all excited about the weekend because New Moon comes out! Don’t worry, we already have our tickets. The team left Vinton, Iowa on Monday at an ungodly hour and it’s a miracle we were able to shut the doors with all the luggage we had crammed into the 15 passenger. Some of the team wasn’t too keen on sitting next to each other for 10 hours of travelling; we’re just not there yet, so instead of taking out the back bench seat and putting our the luggage in its place we left it and placed the bags in every nook and cranny we could find. It took us roughly 10 minutes to get in and out of the van at each stop but most people had their own bubble even if it meant everyone kept losing their cell phones, shoes, and knitting needles.

We’re loving our new home in Michigan which we share with a small rodent that leapt down our staircase after Stephon saw him and screamed bloody murder. We’re only 20 minutes from a Wal-Mart, we get to eat all our meals at a cafeteria, and aside from Jhaki we’ve all taken up knitting or crocheting so friends and family of Cedar 1 should be expecting some great stocking stuffers come Christmas time.

Most of our first week was spent taking out invasive species around the YMCA camp. All decked out in our coveralls, earplugs, gloves, and protective goggles we had several kids come up to us asking us if we worked for NASA. Oh fifth graders, they say the darndest things. A local paper stopped by on Wednesday to interview our team and take pictures of us cutting down Buckthorn and spraying herbicide so we’re a pretty big deal now in rural Michigan. The story made front page and people won’t stop coming up to us asking for autographs…ok not really. But give it time. (http://www.mlive.com/news/jackson/index.ssf/2009/11/volunteers_are_clearing_invasi.html)

Actually a group of us were at the local family establishment/sports bar last night and somehow word was getting around the bar that the AmeriCorps people from the paper were there so we had several people come up to us and talk to us. My favorite was a 53 year old Scottish guy named George who’d only been in the US for 5 years who cursed like a sailor and was telling us about how he’s going for the highest bejeweled record on Facebook which he plays on his blackberry. Why he has internet on his phone and I don’t is still a complete mystery to me.

24 and counting...

It’s been another crazy busy week here in Iowa there was a lot to get done because most of us are going to be away on our SPIKE projects for the next month.

I spent the early part of this week competing in the AmeriOympics, which was a day of athletic competition between the two campus units, which are Oak and Cedar. I’m on the Cedar Unit, which I quickly learned is made up mainly of drama kids, band geeks, animal lovers, vegans, knitters, etc… AKA the kids that were always picked last in gym class. Oak on the other hand is made up of all the jocks of campus because two of the teams are the fire teams who had to complete an intense physical fitness test to even be considered for the team. So from the start it really wasn’t going to be a fair competition and I mean no disrespect but it was literally like someone thought combining the special Olympics and the regular Olympics together would be a good idea and that people might still be surprised by who takes bronze, silver, and gold. We didn’t stand a chance and my team lost all of the 7 competitions we competed in except for kickball, which we tied so it wasn’t even a legit win.

Needless to say my teams moral was bruised and battered but luckily we were about to have our own chance to shine because on Thursday we were competing in the coffeehouse/talent show. Originally I had come up with this awesome idea that our team should do a dance to a popular pop song so I suggested Party in the U.S.A by Miley Cyrus. I was quickly vocalized that no one was very jazzed about the idea even though I volunteered to take one for the team and play the part of Miley. So we decided on We’re All In This Together from High School Musical which I don’t really see how that is any less embarrassing but we all agreed to do it (although there were several times where people threatened to leave because they felt we were just going to embarrass ourselves). After weeks of rehearsal we got our chance to perform it and there had been quite a bit of anticipation throughout campus on how it would turn out because a lot of people were a little skeptical of grown adults dancing along to HSM. Understandable. We were given the coveted finale slot on the program and we totally rocked everybody’s socks off and people thought it was really funny because we incorporated a lot of NCCC jokes that referenced campus jokes or training we had learned such as the gyrating CPR move which I will take credit for coming up with. Let’s just say our coolness points went way and people are constantly asking us to do the dance for them to which I fake modesty and tell them I couldn’t possibly….then I hit the music and bust a move like Zac Efron. Anyways you can see for yourself if you check out the link.
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=542585482610&ref=mf

So when I signed up for NCCC I thought it was going to be like college without the homework. I was horribly mistaken. Every person on my team has a rep role such as peer helper, photographer, VST(Van Safety and Tools), capper, etc…We all kinda got to pick our roles and I chose yearbook and Media Rep. Yearbook I picked because it will probably be the only thing this year that I will make that I could possibly add to my portfolio for future jobs. The Media Rep I only took because someone threw out the name Anderson Cooper, maybe you’ve heard of him, and said that last year he did a story on one of the teams and some lucky media rep got to correspond him. Or at least that’s what I was told, with my luck I’d probably be stuck talking with his personal assistant but all I’m saying is don’t be surprised if you’re flipping channels and see me on CNN 360 chatting it up with Anderson or possibly conversing with Barbra Walters on 20/20 about my love for my country. Dare to dream. The position has turned out to be a little more intense than I thought it would be and I’m really regretting dropping out of AP English after sophomore year in high school because I’m already running out of interesting adjectives. Last week I spent several hours with my co Media Rep Alissa writing my first press release and sent them out to papers in the local area describing the current job my team is working. Tomorrow we’ll be leaving at 6:30 in the morning and heading North to Jackson, Michigan (which happens to be the birth place of the Ritz Cracker and I’m praying there’s a factory where I can go see how they squeeze the peanut butter between the two baby crackers). I’m going to be working at a YMCA environmental camp as a cabin leader where we’ll be leading mainly 5th and 6th graders from Toledo, Illinois. It should be interesting dealing with kids who are just entering puberty and I’m sure many hilarious stories will ensue.

On Friday I turned the big 24 and this was the first time I’ve celebrated a birthday outside of Washington so that was strange but a fun new experience. On the morning of my birthday I got up in front of the Friday community meeting to announce when and where the knitting club would be meeting this week and then someone shouted out that it was my birthday and lead nearly 200 people into singing happy birthday which was ridiculously awkward and I never know what expression to show on my face when people are singing happy birthday to me so I probably went through 20 facial expressions before finding one that felt natural. Later that day I found out that girl on campus named Victoria was celebrating an 11/13/85 b-day which excited me because I’ve never met someone with the same birthday and I let her know I was upset that she didn’t come stand with me during the mass happy birthday sing along and that I felt bad for snagging all the birthday attention away from her. I asked her a lot of questions about the day she was born just to see how similarly our lives began and I found out that while I was born in Walla Walla General Hospital she was birthed on the toilette seat in her parent’s home in Maryland. I thought that was kinda weird but went along with it and played it off like it’s a totally normal thing to be born on the crapper…

P.S. Thanks to everyone for the letters, packages, phone calls, texts, wall posts, etc. on my birthday. It meant a lot and I'm so lucky to have you as friends!

I Heart Toms

Dearest Jessica Marie Miller,

Thank you ever so much for the Toms shoes that i received in the mail this morning. Once again my team leader gave them to me before class and everyone was ooooohing and aaaaaahing over them and now i look super socially conscious which is also a major plus.. I've wanted a pair for so long. You know me too well. They fit like a glove and they perfectly accent my AmeriCorps uniform. You're the best BFFEL. EVER.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Rob

TGIF even without Boy Meets World

TGIF. The sun is shining, I have the day off, I’m in the only coffee shop in Vinton, and I am strategically seated next to a group of 6 elderly women who are chatting about all the town gossip. They just finished talking about all their theories on why ‘Vivien’ wasn’t at church on Sunday and how she used to be Lutheran. I’m eating this up.

Last weekend was of course Halloween and if you’ve seen my Facebook profile lately you’d know that I did indeed dress up as a Care Bear. Tender Heart Bear to be more specific. We also had Cheer Bear, Lucky Bear, Bedtime Bear, Grumpy Bear, and Share Bear. I really wanted to be Secret Bear but Wal-Mart was out of yellow sweat suits. I guess there’s always next year? A big group of us went to the local roller-skating rink, which was super fun except I’ve had a slight burning sensation in my feet ever since so I might have the onset of athlete’s foot. After the novelty of roller-skating wore off, most of us headed over to one of the two bars in town called Mickey’s and it was a little like walking onto the set of Cheer’s where everybody knows your name. AmeriCorps had definitely taken over and the locals seemed a little overwhelmed. They had a costume contest and we Care Bears were totally snubbed but somehow Ketchup and Mustard placed 3^rd. The judge said he thought the condiments were really original and he had never seen that done before and I really wanted to ask him when the was the last time he had seen 6 Care Bears in a bar!!!?? Once again, pick your battles. So me and my friend Janene were dancing the night away and we get this simultaneous craving for the song Buttons by the Pussycat Dolls so we went up to the DJ and requested it and for some strange reason he asked for our names which we kindly gave him. Long story short, an hour later as Janene and I are grabbing our coats to leave we hear our names announced and to my horror find out we had signed up for Karaoke. I was mortified. The only other time I have done Karaoke was in a foreign country and the only other people in the bar were drunk and spoke only Dutch. There was no escaping so Janene and I go up to the stage and I quickly realized that the only part of buttons I know is the chorus because I only listen to the remix which is 20 times faster than the original and most of the verses are cut out entirely. It wasn’t pretty and I had hoped to make my US Karaoke debut dressed as something other than every little girls favorite 80’s cartoon character.

The past week has been a whirlwind of crazy so this is the first chance I’ve had to blog. Last Friday my team started our first 3-day project where we worked on cleaning up an old trail that was once an abandoned railroad and was turned into a nature trail in 2000. No government money has been used on it so it’s all been volunteer work and donation so we were asked to help out. Armed with my safety goggles, leather gloves and a bow saw I spent three days walking approximately 7 miles of trail while cutting back trees and bushes that were too close to the trail and could harm runners, bikers, or old men on John Deer’s who might be out on a Sunday ride. Our sponsor on the project was a retired schoolteacher named Nancy Baldwin and she was just the sweetest old woman ever. Every day we worked she brought us homemade oatmeal cookies and rice crispy treats along with orange Kool-aid packets to put in our water bottles. On Halloween a group of us went to trick or treat at Nancy and her husband Ron’s house and she gave us all popcorn balls that nearly chipped off all my front teeth with the first bite. She said she used melted caramel corn to make them but she must have had those things in storage for the past ten years. I guess it’s the thought that counts. The next day on the work site she had some more for us to eat during our morning break but I opted out for a rice crispy instead.

On Tuesday we had another project an hour away where we removed the inside cardboard panels and insulation of a roof in what used to be a dining hall at a church camp ground. We were all really excited to do some demolition and to wear our new outfits. If you imagine the construction worker from the Village People that’s basically what my work outfit looked like except without the cutoffs but let me tell you I put up a fight to wear my cutoffs but they said it was impractical and that I needed to wear my coveralls. Whatever. Pick your battles.

With all of my long work days filled with nothing more than hard labor the one thing that really kept me going was my weekly Wednesday night GLEE so I’ve been a lil bit upset these past two weeks where there’s been nothing but a rerun and something called the World Series?? Whatever that is? I mean who do these Yankees think they are?? Why couldn’t they have played a day earlier or aired their game on LIFETIME??? All I’m saying is if this happens again next week I will be writing a letter to someone important like Tyra who could do something about it.